Tuesday, July 6, 2010

So Near, and Yet...




December 2, 1970 Wednesday
Everything was buried under mounds of snow this morning. Oatus started right up but the Family Dog had to be pushed and shoved all over the place before he finally got going and that didn't last for long. About two miles down the road, the Dog started sputtering and losing power.
I pulled off and tore into the engine room. The carburetor was icing up and when Oatus returned, we pulled the spark plugs and found them badly fouled. A quick clean-up and we were on the road again, as far as Arctic (a very chilly place), where Oatus stalled out. There wasn't enough juice in the 12-volt battery to kick him over again.
Arctic consists of a gas station (sort of) which seems to be perpetually closed. The tiny parking lot consists of one slush-filled pothole with numerous ruts thrown in for ambiance. I got behind Oatus with the Family Dog and shoved and pushed and grunted and strained, with no visible effect. Soon, however, we were joined by two fellows driving by in a telephone truck who loaned us the use of their backs. With this combined help, we finally got that Oatusonofabitch clattering and smoking again.
By that time, the Family Dog's plugs were fouled and the carburetor was icing up again. I ripped out the heat baffle, taped up the carburetor with insulation tape, adjusted the points, cleaned the plugs, and got the hell out of there. It appears this journey is going to be a blood and guts battle right up to the very last.
Off into the driving snow once again – we're a pretty band of harassed refugees. At last we emerged from the wilds and ran into Interstate 5, which we have been dreading for some time now. Unfortunately it's the only way into Seattle, and we are not too keen on piloting pokey, disintegrating old Oatus in swift waters.
We made a last gas stop thirty miles south of our destination and made a detour off the Interstate and onto Highway 99. Chris is expecting that undersized piston to blow at any time and doesn't want to be stuck in rush hour traffic when it does.
However, we did pay a price for this decision. As we chugged into Federal Way, we were captured again, this time by the Washington State Patrol, and taken to one of their temples of money-changing to be held for ransom. It appears that they don't like our brakes or steering any better than the California Copgoblins. They, at least, have an acceptable solution. All we have to do is pay them $30 and everything will be hunky-dory again.

Monday, May 24, 2010

Washington at Last



December 1, 1970 Tuesday
Lordy – amongst all the hail, lightning and thunder last night it also found time to snow.
The Family Dog's battery is shot. Old Oatus had to be employed to shove him 50 yards down the road before he finally kicked over. We were finally ready to go by 08:00 but Felix went over the hill and it wasn't until 09:15 that we located him, slam dunked him into the truck and split for the highway.
At Neskowin we left the coast and moved inland towards Tillamook. The hail started coming down so heavily that it was all my wipers could do to keep the windshield clear and before long, the road had all but disappeared. For twenty miles we sloughed and skidded through the slush, stopping occasionally to pour another gallon of bulk oil down Oatus' craw. Finally we careened into Tillamook and stopped to fuel Oatus. Five miles further on, in Bay City, we stopped to fuel ourselves at the local greasy spoon.
At Warrenton, after fighting our way over four or five lofty, snow-covered peaks, we discovered that one of our undersized pistons was clattering like hell and threatening to disintegrate along with the recently replaced water pump. It looks like we're down to the wire and it's going to be a close finish, if we make it at all.
At 15:30 we made it to Astoria, got soaked $3 to use their bridge into Washington state and found ourselves on the final leg of our voyage. Like an omen, the setting sun dropped under the clouds and drenched everything in a golden glow creating a beautiful double rainbow, the ends of which fell onto the shores of Washington and seductively beckoned us onward.
At the north end of the bridge we turned right onto Highway 401 and hit the nearest rest stop long enough to call Lou. He wasn't home but his wife Rita said she would start thawing the Thanksgiving turkey which would take about three days. Should work out fine.
At Highway 4 we came left and soon joined Highway 101 once again. No dry firewood to be found anywhere so out of frozen desperation, I ripped up a 4” x 4” highway sign and we continued on into the night looking for a berth.
I ran on ahead in the Dog to scout for berths while Oatus plodded along behind, smoking and clattering. This went on for some 28 miles and before we knew it, we were pulling into South Bend, totally beat. We gassed up here and learned of a rest stop outside of town.
Finding it was another matter that took us another hour. After questioning a number of the local natives we found that it wasn't even labeled as a rest stop and in fact turned out to be the parking lot of the Bonneville Dam power substation.
Too exhausted to care, we pulled in and cut the engines only to have their noise replaced by the staccato blasting of a bunch of rednecks having their evening target practice at the Willapa Harbor Gun Club about 50 yards away.
“Great,” said Chris. “When they get done they'll be able to continue practicing on us.”
But for some reason, they didn't. Imagine our relief.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

It's Cold, and the Law of Gravity is Temporarily Repealed


November 30, 1970, Monday – somewhere north of Gardiner, Oregon
Awoke to hail pounding on the roof and thunder and lightning splitting the skies.
Oatus' oil is down to the halfway mark on the stick so I went into town and dug up 5 gallons of bulk oil while Chris stayed aboard and cut the new gasket for the rear end. Money's getting short - after buying the oil I was left with $10.
At 12:00 we were underway. The weather has turned bitterly cold and Chris is having a miserable time of it with no window on the driver's side.
Oatus' tank went dry six miles south of Yachats, and a few miles before that, coming out of a tunnel, a freak wind bore Chris's hatch covering over his bunk straight up into the skies, never to be seen again.
Once we got to Yachats Jeri Ann treated us to a chicken dinner and we rolled off again, happily strewing the roadside with chicken bones. The crows and vultures that have been following us since we left Marin seemed satisfied with our offering, at least for now.
The weather became an on-again, off-again, type of thing throughout the day. You name it – sun, rain, hail, terrific winds...we spent the day sweating firewood.
Outside of Depoe Bay we got stopped by a friendly deputy sheriff who apparently just wanted to assure himself that we were for real.
“I don't know whether to laugh or just smile,” he said.
“Go ahead and laugh,” said Chris.
He was Good Folks and told us of a rest stop we could hit for the night, since darkness was coming on. Chris and Jeri Ann drove on while I hit a much-needed rest and gas stop in Depoe Bay.
This is a good night to be ashore. The rollers are thundering into the beach pushed by a howling wind filled with stinging sleet. We located Highway 18 and grudgingly crawled eastward. I say “grudgingly” because we are extremely opposed to every point of the compass except north. Finally, we ran into the rest stop a mile west of the Tillamook County line and tied up for the night; then came the nightly sortie for firewood. I located some green alder which all but smoked us out of the truck; so we were forced to cannibalize wood from the truck. Alas, but it was necessary. The temperature was miserably low.

Friday, April 30, 2010

Oregon Welcomes Oatus




Rick and Chris, our intrepid Vietnam vet/hippie heroes, have managed to make it across the California state line and into Oregon. We join them as they continue up Highway 101:
November 28, 1970, continued - We made it to Brookings at 14:00 and stopped at Harris Beach State Park to steal a shower and do our laundry, activities you wouldn't normally associate with your standard, garden variety, dirty hippie scum types. Oh well...we're willing to bend the rules, as long as the shock value is undiminished.
We lingered too long and darkness caught us; also, when we tried to leave, Oatus wouldn't respond to the starter so we decided to hang around and see what morning brought. Evening brought something else first – maniacs with loud cars and loud horns. Little did we realize as we built Oatus what an astounding effect he would have on otherwise possibly normal people. It appears he drives them into a sort of hysteria which causes them to start screaming and blaring their horns as they roar past the truck at great speed. Peculiar phenomenon, and it caused us to force Oatus out of his self-imposed hibernation and back onto the road to find more acceptable lodgings for the night.
November 29, 1970 Sunday – Got on the road at 10:00 this morning with the weather holding out nicely. The tires were going flat so we stopped at the first gas station we could find at Pistol River and asked the attendant if he had any air.
“Yer breathin' it,” was all he said.
We guessed that he was saying “no” so we settled for a buck's worth of gas for the Family Dog and two bucks worth for Oatus. This held us until Port Orford when we stopped again for a fill up - $9.00 worth.
At 14:00 we rolled into Bandon and stopped to look up a friend of Granny Hip's named Hazel. Her antique shop was closed but I managed to call her at home although that didn't really accomplish anything. We hit the road again at 14:30 with ominous black clouds building up offshore.
Coos Bay was a fight to get through – a big busy lumber town that we were more than glad to put astern. got into Winchester Bay around dusk and laid two quarts of oil on Oatus, who has taken up the nasty habit of smoking like a chimney. The weather is really going foul and it's getting colder.
We finally tied up for the night a mile north of Gardiner on a side road at the top of a hill, right above a stinking, smoking paper mill.
The rear end is leaking oil badly – something that will have to be corrected before we go taking off tomorrow. calling it quits for the day I trundled on down into Gardiner and called Lou and my folks.
Not bad – 150 miles today. Our best so far. If we can keep this up, Friday will find us home free – maybe.

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

We Add a Crew Member


Rick drew this illustration back in 1973, he thinks.

November 20, 1970, Saturday
This corner of California completely rolls up the streets at noon on Saturday so I had to work fast. This wasn't made any easier by the fact that the long-dreaded winter rains have hit us at last.
I got Oatus' 12-volt battery charged, did the laundry, picked up a 1/2” die to cut some new threads on those three stripped tire lugs and bought three new lug nuts.
Back at the truck, Chris was in a foul and obscene mood. Yesterday we pulled out the starboard brake cylinder and took it in to have it honed. Re-installed, it worked fine.
Today, the port cylinder came out and needed the same treatment but by then it was after 12:00 and everything was closed, so Chris did what he could with a piece of steel wool. Re-installed, it leaked like a drunk with bad kidneys. So now our brakes, formerly quite serviceable, are shot down the tubes again and here we sit, with rain on the roof, until Monday morning at least. #%*!!#!!
November 21, 1970, Sunday – We have been going through candles pretty fast and at thirty-nine cents a box, it's starting to add up. In response to this latest crisis, Chris went out and cannibalized our four useless 6-volt clearance lights and hooked them up inside. Presto! Oatus has electric lighting. Now we can see the leaks more clearly.
November 22, 1970, Monday – All right! It's Monday! Everybody back to work!
I took the Port brake cylinder back to Harvey the Honer who said it would be ready by 13:30; then I made it into town for groceries.
On the way back I picked up a hitch-hiker soaking in the rain. Two hitchers, really. She had a little wisp of a dog named “Metoo” with her. Her name was Jeri Drake, and she was headed for Canada.
Back at the truck with everything hanging up over the stove to dry, we discovered that she was in no particular hurry, so we decided to travel together.
Travel? HAH. When we got the brake cylinder back from Harvey and got it installed the brake fluid poured out of it like it wasn't even there. Later, we discovered that the seals were twisted and when that was corrected they seemed to work.
We have been waiting for the Copgoblins to return with more citations since it is illegal to park for more than 72 hours in one spot. Our time is about up.
Sho' nuff. One drove up this afternoon just as our time expired but only to find out how things were going, or rather how long it would be before we got this eyesore off the highway he has been sworn to protect.

Still in Crescent City (well, Smith River, actually)

November 27, 1970, Friday
Well, for one whole week we have sat here trying to accomplish what would have normally taken about a day or so. Every time the rain lets up we dash outside to try to get something done, but before we can actually get it on, it starts pouring again. It's like we're being watched or something.
On Wednesday, the weather actually broke for most of the day which was a much needed truce. I got up into the bunks and stripped them, throwing soaked blankets, mattresses and rugs up onto the roof to dry out. I tried to get the casement window open on my side but the moisture had swollen it shut and all I ended up doing was to break the glass in my efforts to get it raised. The rest of the day was spent making repairs; in the midst of these, it started raining again and I had to go topside and dump the bedding back down through the hatch. What a wreck. The truck looks like a hurricane hit it.
At 16:00, Tiger Whitehurst, Mother President of the Devil's Disciples, Crescent City Chapter, Planet Earth and Company, came by and invited us to dinner. Chris and Jeri Ann partook of the honor while I stayed aboard to stand Quarterdeck watch in their absence.
The Disciples (a local outlaw motorcycle club) offered us Thanksgiving dinner if we were still around on Thursday, which we were, but we didn't make it.
Friday found us almost finished with our labors. We got the brake lights working and then tried to take up the play in the brake pedal by adjusting the plunger into the master cylinder.
Naturally, it broke off so away I went, fuming, to try and locate another one. Out of luck! I may as well try to locate a Brontosaurus.
I did manage to get the thing welded, though. After another stop to take on stores, it was back to the ship.

Sunday, February 28, 2010

The Copgoblins of Crescent City


Our story: It is November, 1970. Chris and Rick, intrepid hippie adventurers and Vietnam war veterans, are traveling from Marin County, California, to Seattle, Washington, in Oatus, a 1946 Dodge flatbed truck with a house they have built on the back, and the Family Dog, a VW Beetle.
November 19, 1970, Friday, continued
In the opinion of the gentleman at the California Highway Patrol Motor Vehicle Inspection station outside of Crescent City, Oatus is evil in respect to his poor operational continuity and after liberally plastering us with citations, the inspecting officer suggested we pull over soon and correct a few dozen of them.
God knows we'll do that. We don't like them any better than they do. Because of them we are fifteen days out of San Francisco and still not out of California. Tonight, however, would bring an end to that, we thought, totally unaware that we were under siege. We had just turned off Highway 199 onto Highway 101 and were looking forward to a mere twenty minutes of remaining California citizenship. We pulled over to the side of the road to let a few cars pass and then pulled out again.
Bang! A Copgoblin passed up my Port side, cut directly in front of me and sandwiched himself between us, a maneuver he could not have performed successfully if I hadn't stood on my brakes hard.
After such a jugheaded stunt, I figured we would probably get a safety lecture along with another generous sprinkling of citations, and so we did.
The citations were for having nonfunctional brakes, one nonfunctional brake light, and for willfully refusing to pull over and fix these things after being supposedly directed to do so three separate times by the officer at the Crescent City check stop. First time I had heard of it. Chris attributed the whole misunderstanding to semantics.
At any rate, since the shoulder we were parked on was much too steep to do any work, we were told to find a place that was suitable and get to work!
Then, after taking numerous pictures of the truck, he took his leave of us.
We rolled slowly down the road, sadly looking for a spot to accommodate us. We pulled over once to let a car pass but the car pulled over with us.
It was another Copgoblin and we had just saved him the trouble of having to turn on his Agatcha light.
This fellow was six feet, two inches of chinless God's Wrath named John Lewis. He was not amused; this was the “worst operational hazard” he had ever seen on the road (he must be new on the job).
He would not be placated.
His judgment was final.
For two cents he would impound the vehicle as unsafe and we damn sure better know that he was vested with the power to do so! In fact, he was so emphatic that we understand the vast extent of his powers that he repeated the fact several times during his righteously indignant tirade.
“THERE ARE TWO LICENSE PLATES ON THAT VOLKSWAGEN! TAKE OFF THE TOP ONE SO I CAN SEE THE ONE UNDERNEATH! IS THIS A STOLEN CAR?” he cried.
He was now operating at such a peak of efficiency that he was asking us questions that he would not allow us the time to answer. He, Officer John Lewis, had all the answers here and was functioning accordingly, totally in control of our situation, our little drama here at the side of the road.
To ring down the curtain on his triumphant performance, he accused us of trying to escape again and issued another citation to us for disobedience of a direct order to stay put, which we were now subsequently directed to do, without recourse or appeal.
To further clarify to what extent we must stay put, he began playing the Flawless Organizer Amidst Morons game with perfect exaggeration.
“When I say stay put I don't mean stay put fifty miles down the road! I don't mean stay put over there...” (he indicated the other side of the road)
“I mean stay put! HERE! RIGHT here! Do not go one inch that way...” (he pointed north) “...and do not go one inch that way!” (he pointed south)
We managed to get out one sentence, by refusing to be interrupted, to the effect that we really weren't liars; that if we had stayed back where we were stopped the second time to work on the violations, we would have capsized Oatus into the sloping ditch there when we jacked him up.
Officer John Lewis knew he had caught us for sure this time; in fact, we had caught ourselves with our own words.
“ We-ell now! After you were stopped at the inspection point you totally ignored the cutoff to Highway 199, didn't you?”
Caught by hard fact again, since we were, clearly, northbound on Highway 101, we had to admit we did and this caused Officer Lewis to go into spasms of great delight.
“There are plenty of flat places out that road to pull over onto. Plenty! I know! I've been out there hundreds of times!”
Smitten to the dust, our lying deceitful selves exposed for what they were by the scalpel of Badged Truth, Officer John Lewis, Copgoblin Extraordinaire, drove off in triumph to locate more evil.
Captured as we were with absolutely no possible alternative, we bit off our curses and prepared to tear into the brakes again.

Monday, January 18, 2010

It's Not Chocolate Milk; Fabled Orick

Nov. 18, 1970, Thursday
It's 06:15. No matter. Dark as it is, it's already obvious that it's going to be one of those Golden Autumn Days. Later on, a few shafts of thin sunlight peeked through the clump of alder trees on our east side and burst through the port windows. It's the kind of light that's so fresh and bright that it totally illuminates everything about the object it falls upon, or through.
In this case, at 07:45, it is blindingly evident that the windows must be washed; as the daylight improved, we were also able to notice that several tires were going flat. So, the first thing we did today was to rumble off to Trinidad for refills; then we pulled into a rest stop off Highway 101 to finish hassling with the brakes.
Yesterday it was the Hydraulics (brakes; water pump); today it's the Pneumatics (air pressure; tires). Oatus has plenty of Earth in his sign but most of it is on him, this of course being due to truckin'. Much of the Earth in him has been removed by us since we departed Marin, this being due to mechanical necessity, with more to come anticipated. The Fire portion of his personality (ignition; combustion) has already become familiar to us, also with more to come anticipated.
When Chris pulled the port axle and found half of it dry and covered with rust, we decided to tear into the rear end also. We got the fill plug out and found the anemic remains of what was once 90-weight differential oil, now reduced to the consistency of chocolate milk.
~ And precious little of it, too! More things to do.
The day's efforts showed these results:
1.One of the pistons in the port forward brake cylinder is frozen up, so we have only half a brake there; same is true for the starboard side.
The rear end leaks oil. Somebody filled the original drain with a plug and tapped in a hole for the existing one right next to it. The plug is not a good one and neither is the gasket between it and the inspection plate.
But at least we have brakes again! These little discrepancies we learned about today will become additions to our growing list of Things We Must Keep An Eye On.
Nov. 19, 1970 Friday – The only thing we waited around for this morning was the coffee water to boil. Off and away at 08:15 with only 60 miles left of California to put under our wheels.
At last we arrived in fabled Orick! It's referred to as “fabled” only because it has been the next point on the map for several days now. I thought we'd never get here!

Fabled Orick

Our story: It is November, 1970. Chris and Rick, intrepid hippie adventurers and Vietnam war veterans, are traveling from Marin County, California, to Seattle, Washington, in Oatus, a 1946 Dodge flatbed truck with a house they have built on the back, and the Family Dog, a VW Beetle. They left Marin on November 4, and now, fifteen days out, they have made it to Orick, California, a distance of some 372 miles, give or take. They have finally arrived in fabled Orick, which has been the next dot on the map for several days, and we come in as Rick goes into a store to purchase a pack of smokes.
November 19, 1970, Friday
This was a fuel stop also. The old man in the store said he was sorry but he would have to see some identification before he would sell me a pack of Camels.
“We keep our eyes open 'round here,” he intoned, peering up at me over his spectacles and the old brass cash register. “Ain't gonna git caught, y'see.”
“Who's going to try to catch you?” I asked.
He glanced quickly at me, sideways. “Nobody, I said. Ain't gonna git caught 'cause we keep our eyes open 'round here!”
He rang up the paper towels and struggled for a moment trying to read the price label on the coffee which was written in grease pencil on the top, bold and black.
But when he reached for the breakfast rolls, he went off like a bomb!
“Oh, my,” he said, and began squeezing the package all over, “Oh, my! These are old! These are hard as a rock! This won't do, won't do at all!”
Professional criticism I'd say. They had been left over for a day or two but they looked okay to me.
However, it wouldn't do, as he had said earlier. He took me back to the roll department for an adequate exchange. Unfortunately, there were none. The main deciding factor in my picking that package was that it was the only one there. I was able to assure him that it really was OK but only after he insisted on knocking price down to 30 cents.
“We keep our eyes open 'round here, d' y' see?” he said, mellow at last. I said that I did.
“Ain't gonna git caught!” Then he smiled an old smile and winked, as if to say he knew all the time that I wasn't one of those people.
Here's an old man who, after a lifetime of apparently honest work, is still in the harness and still honest! In the process, he's developed the attitude of an escaped convict who's on the lam in a hostile environment. In order to cover his trail he's adopted a personal commitment to total honesty, motivated by his fear of getting caught.
After a lifetime of existence in the good ol' U.S.A., why should an old man have to feel that being “at large,” so to speak, is an acceptable price to pay for his continued freedom? Furthermore, why should a young man find himself compelled to interpret the scene as such anyway??
Considering the murders at Kent State University last May, the old man' attitude begins to seem both prudent and wise. I'm fearful of thinking that this might be one of the possible answers to the above rhetorical questions.
If so, here's another: what's the point of even having a society at all if you're going to permit murder to be an acceptable part of its structure?
Getting underway again, these thoughts were tumbling around inside my head, setting off alarms concerning the nature of our own perilous situation. Good thing, too! As we neared the borders of this uncertain land, we were laid siege to and ultimately captured by the black and white Copgoblins. There are bands of these folk prowling every corner of the land, fanatically challenging evil wherever it may or may not exist.
Whether or not there is evil in Oatus is, of course, a matter of opinion.